Fan Fiction: Sueing seeds chapter 2 causing much angst
Sueing seeds chapter 2 causing much angst
The whole crew of the Archangel was gathered for the funeral. There was sadness in the air, as would be expected since two crewmen had just died. However no one's grief matched Sai's as his body was draped on a coffin as he sobbed. "It's so unfair Cussey, you never got to leave the ship like you wanted."
Tolle put his hand on Sai's shoulder. "I know we all miss Cussey."
"Now we will never have that talk when he got discharged, you remember that scene don't you Tolle?" Said said. Tolle shook his head. "I looked so cool in that scene."
The only person not sharing in the grief was Shelliwyn. She had her arms crossed and was impatiently tapping her foot. "When am I going to leave?" She said.
"Oops. I have a shuttle ready for you." Captain Ramius said.
"Thank you big sister Merue." Shelliwyn said as her anger faded. Shelliwyn immediately headed to the shuttle.
"Your'e leaving already? Say hello to Dearka for me." Mirella said.
"Who's Dearka?" Tolle questioned.
"Oh just someone I was helping with merchandise. Yes that all it is, merchandise." Mirella said laughing nervously.
"Yeah whatever I'll do that." Shelliwyn said as she boarded the shuttle.
It had barely taken off when Lacus asked Cagali "Are you alright with this? after all you are Athrun's canonical girlfriend."
"There is little I could do if Shelliwyn had tried to stop me. Besides there is a Gary Stu fic coming up next week and let me say my chances are pretty good. If he ever finds out about that I have something bring up as well." When she saw Lacus's scandalized look she rertorted "Hey it's not like Athrun's the only one you get's to cheat via fanfic."
Just then the voice of Natarle came in through in intercom. "There is an unknown object that needs to investigated. Kira, Take the Strike and check it out."
"But I don't wanna. I am too bummed from Shelliwyn leaving to do anything." Kira said.
"You better do it, otherwise you won't be in the fanfic anymore." Natarle retorted.
"If you put it that way, I'll do it." Kira said.
Kira boarded the Strike and took off. It wasn't long before he saw that the unidentified object was a shuttle. A weak radio signal was emitted. "Hello mobile suit. We are Shelliwyn's parents and we are looking for our daughter."
As soon as Kira made that discovery another mobile suit came into view. It was the stolen Earth Federation mobile suit Duel piloted by the temperamental Yzak Jule.
At that moment Kira dismissed the idea of getting brownie points with Shelliwyn by saving her parents. He had a darker plan, something that had worked before by accident. "Hey Yzak it's a good thing I'm fighting you." Kira said.
"Why is that?" Yzak asked.
"I can fight you without worrying about you accidentally hitting the shuttle." Kira said.
"Why would I want to do that?" Yzak asked. "Are you trying to trick me?"
"Oh no I would never do that. I was just thinking what a wuss you are." Kira said.
"Oh yeah I show you who the wuss is." Yzak said as he pointed a gun at the shuttle and fired. The shuttle could not handle a shot from the duel's beam rifle and exploded.
Kira laughed "You know what you just did, Yzak? You killed Shelliwyn's parents." He said as the Strike turned around to fly back to the Archangel.
"Shelliwyn? No, how could I have done such a thing?" Yzak yelled. Even though he never had even met Shelliwyn he was still under her spell.
Once Kira returned to the Archangel he dismounted the Strike with a sorrowful look. Not that he was actually sad but Kira had a lot of experience with angst and was able to pull it off perfectly. He looked around to find Shelliwyn but the only person of note that he saw was Cagali.
"Do you know where Shelliwyn is, I have some bad news to tell her." Kira said.
"Shelliwyn already left, what is the news?" Cagali asked.
"Shelliwyn's parents are dead." Kira said. Cagali started to cry. "What's the problem Cagali? I know we all feel bad for Shelliwyn but aren't you overdoing it a bit?"
"But Shelliwyn is my long lost sister." Cagali said.
"Oh my I never knew that." Kira said.
"It's even worse than that, because I am also you long lost sister." Cagali said.
Kira thought for a moment "If Shelliwyn's your sister and you my sister that means that Shelliwyn is also my sister." He said. Cagali nodded in agreement. "Wow I tricked Yzak into killing my own parents. This fic is going to give me more angst than I thought."
Meanwhile Athrun was strolling down the hallway whistling a happy tune. His good day was interrupted by Nichol when he said "Athrun you there is a fanfic going on, don't you?"
"Yeah what's wrong?" Athrun asked.
"You know that you are supposed to be somber and angsty during the fanfic?" Nichol said.
"That's right. Darn I was having such a good day too. I guess I can always use a flashback to put a stop to that." Athrun said. Nichol nodded in agreement. Athrun thought back to the time when he fought Kira just after the Archangel left Orb. His phase shift armor was down and he was at the mercy of his best friend turned enemy. Suddenly the Blitz came charging in to save Athrun, but the Strike's giant blade rose to…..
"Um Athrun I'm not that comfortable with you having that flashback." Nichol Interrupted.
"Very well, I use another one." Athrun said as he rolled his eyes.
Athrun stood in front of Lacus in the ruined concert hall. She questioned him "What is it you fight for? Is it your father's orders, or that medal?"
"No that one isn't working. I guess I will have to use a different one." Athrun said.
Kira stood in the strike with the cockpit open. Across the void of space Athrun stood in the Aegis with the newly returned Lacus. Athrun beckoned for Kira to join Zaft so they wouldn't have to fight against each other. Kira refused saying that he had people he had to protect. This memory brought a gloomy expression to Athrun's face as he stared into space. "Perfect." Nichol said in approval.
"You think so?" Athrun asked. Nichol gave him a thumbs up.
Athrun walked down the hall and was greeted by Shelliwyn. "What are you doing here?" He asked.
"I wasn't in the story for a couple of pages so I decided to show up and besides your going to be my boyfriend in this fanfic." Shelliwyn said.
"Is that so? I am sorry but I am having too much angst at the moment to do the whole puppy love thing." Athrun said.
"Why are you so down Athrun?" Shelliwyn asked.
"It's this whole war and how I have to fight Kira. It makes me feel really bummed." Athrun said.
Shelliwyn thought for a moment. Then Her face lit up "I have a great idea that will end this war." Shelliwyn said as she grabbed Athrun by the hand and ran toward the bridge.
Shelliwyn met Rau Lacrusset and whispered her plan into his ear. "Oooh that sounds like a deliciously wonderful." He said. Rau then turned to face the crew and exclaimed "Crew we are going to set up a broadcast! We need to get some things ready."
A couple of hours later Dearka came stumbling to the bridge with his hands clamped over his ears trying to block out the hellish din emanating from somewhere on the bridge. "What the hell is this noise?!" He yelled.
"Don't you like it? It's Britney Spears." Shelliwyn said as she danced to the music. "Whenever I am feeling down I listen to her and she cheers me up. So I thought if everyone listened to her that they would all feel happy and not want to fight each other anymore."
"Commander, why are you letting this happen?" Dearka asked.
"Dearka, haven't you forgotten that I want to see humanity destroy itself? What better way than through using it's own pop music?" Rau said.
Even on the Archangel the effects of Shelliwyn's plan could be heard. "It's not just us that's hearing this. It's a broadcast that is reaching both the Earth and the Plants. The broadcast is originating from the Vesalius." Miriella explained.
"Oh my god all humanity is having to listen to this." Captain Ramius gasped.
"It must be Lacrusset. Captain let me take off and deal with him." Mu Laflaga said.
"You can't fly straight while listening to this horrible music." Ramius said.
"Then let me take him there. In have a certain tolerance for these sorts of things." Lacus said.
"Okay but come back safely." Ramius said.
"Will do." Mu and Lacus said together. They headed for a spare shuttle and quickly made their way toward the Vesalius. Due to the strain of listening to the pop music defenses of the Vesalius were down and so Mu and Lacuswere able to board without being shot down and undetected.
Except for one person. Rau sensed the presence of Mu and prepared to face him. "Did you think you could sneak aboard without me noticing? I am your father's clone after all, I pratically am you." Rau said.
Suddenly a masked figure came out of nowhere and shot Rau."You can't be Al Laflaga's clone because your my clone, or rather my cheap knockoff." The masked figure said.
"Zechs Marquis, but why is your hair so short?" Shelliwyn asked.
"I am not Zechs my name is Char Aznable." Char said. Shelliwyn looked at Char confused. "You know Char, the red comet? From the original Gundam show?" Char said. Shelliwyn still looked at him with blank stare. "Aw fuck it." Char said as he reached for his pistol and shot Shelliwyn.
Shelliwyn limped tragically (because everything is somehow tragic when a Mary sue dies) towards Mu Laflaga. "You know what really bothers me about you annoying little fangirls? All you ever do is squeel about some angsty little twig of a boy that I could snap in two. Where is the Mu love?" Mu spouted. He then got out a pistol and shot Shelliwyn.
As Shelliwyn lied on the floor tragically dying Haro was still bouncing about shouting gibberish. "It's okay I have new car insurance." One said. Inadvertently it bounced on a button opening the air lock. While the rest of the crew managed to stay safe until it closed again Shelliwyn was sucked outside. Her perfect (albeit slightly perforated) body was preserved forever in the vastness of space.
"I never thought Haro would end up killing Shelliwyn. I always expected it to end up driving Lacus insane." Athrun quieted to a whisper when he realized that Lacus was in earshot.
"I guess that settles that." Mu Laflaga said. "Oh look we have time for a Slash fic. Hey Athrun come over here." He said looking at his watch.
"Um Mu we haven't met before. Besides your technically my enemy and you just shot my girlfriend in this fanfic." Athrun said.
"Athrun Athrun Athrun. I think you should know by know that Plausibility of a relationship has nothing to do with Slash fics." Mu retorted.
"You got me there." Athrun said as he looked into Mu's eyes.